NO SHAME. this is how i'm spending my saturday night. with a nice face mask and a hot shower. i'll then probably make some tea and put on a movie. i've been feeling really off today, just not myself i guess. so a night in is probably the best idea. now time to wash off this mask.

every time i start an entry i always feel like i have so much to say, but it always just comes out as pathetic rants or just boring sentences about what i've been doing lately. it's like i just can't find the words to properly say how i'm feeling or how i'm doing, so i resort back to the boring and the pathetic. it's starting to drive me crazy really. i can feel it all building it up inside, but i end up sitting here just staring at the screen as the little cursor blinks waiting for me to start typing. it's just funny because i remember once being so good as expressing how i was feeling. i was able to just write it all out and it'd be exactly what was in my head. but now i feel this disconnect from my head and the rest of me. disconnect. that's exactly what it is. not even a disconnect from me and everything/one else. but me from what i was. how i used to be. it's like i'm at this completely different stage in my life, and i'm completely enjoying every minute of it. but i miss the way i used to think. i felt like i was much more....poetic. for lack of a better term. i don't know. something is missing. but i don't feel like i'm explain myself well at all. so i'll just end it here and head off to the pub. goodnight, blog.

this is me right now, sitting in my room which is a complete mess right now. i haven't showered in a few days so the sweat from dancing last night is still lingering on my skin. my hair is a mess and my body is either dehydrated or in need of sugar because my hands wont stop trembling. i am completely distracted by everything today so i have a feeling being productive isn't on my to do list, though that wont stop be from trying.

listen to this song: insomnia by electric president.

that is all for now.

i still don't have photo's uploaded. i honestly just forget to do it. i'm sorry. but today was nice. we didn't have our usual irish studies class due to our teacher getting some kind of eye surgery thing. something about his retina? not to sure. anyway, because of that we instead decided to go back to the cliffs of moher to see our exhibit "remember the cliffs". it wasn't until the afternoon so i was able to take my time getting ready this morning, which is always nice. and the bus ride there wasn't to bad, never usually is for me as i tend to just put on my headphones and just become lost in my own thoughts. the exhibit itself was alright. it's pretty cool to be internationally shown now though, i will admit that. even if some of the other artworks were a little...questionable. but to each their own.

as of now i am waiting to skype with my parents for a bit and then kaetlyn and i are off to hang out with jesi and her mom again with a pub visit afterwords. i'm hoping for an enjoyable evening.

positive aspect of the day: listening to something corporate on the bus. i forget how much i love that band. they seriously always put me in the best of moods no matter how shitty i feel. i love them.

anyway, i'm gonna go see if kaetlyn is ready to head out. peace out boy scout.

No picture again today because I just suck. And I'm to lazy to get out my camera to upload photo's. Which would of been from the studio lighting demo my photo teacher gave today. I know, disappointing that you can't see them. But you will! Eventually. This weekend? Gah, I have so much to do.

Positive aspect of the day: Having Jill put on the bad romance video on the projector before our class started. Perfect way to start the day I might say. Oh, and the random burst of energy I got earlier tonight where I just needed to look up old disney songs and dance around the kitchen to them. Singing and dancing in general just kind of make me happy. There's just something about singing off key to something really loudly and completely making a fool of yourself as you try to dance and just not giving a fuck about how ridiculous you look. Seriously, try it sometime.

Anyway, I just came back from Jesi's mom's cottage they're renting for a few weeks and the mix of crashing from the energy burst from earlier, the food coma Jesi's mom's delicious greek chicken dinner gave me and not having enough alcohol to make me tipsy has made severely exhausted. Therefor I must sleep. Possible picture update tomorrow? Yeah don't hold your breath. Goodnight blog.

I feel like I need to start blogging more often. Yes, need. I really would like to keep a consistent blog going for my own sake and to just better organize my thoughts and my life. I'm going to try that whole "post a photo everyday" sort of thing. Starting tomorrow only because I didn't take any photo's today. Oops. I also want to post about a positive aspect of the day as I feel I do to much negative thinking. So a photo + positive thought. Everyday. Abuse me if I slip up, deal?

Today's positive thought: Instead of just thinking about how I need to get shit done, I actually starting doing it. I'm terrible with getting things done because I tend to over contemplate what I need to do, and then just end up getting distracted because I've waited too long. But not today! I'm starting this whole blogging everyday thing, I've created a new flickr (http://www.flickr.com/photos/megan_drmota/) to better organize my photo's (as well as more room as my other is almost full.) and I'm finally doing some much needed laundry.

Oh what the hell, I'll post a photo from this past weekend just because:

For my intermediate photography class my teacher had us experiment with light writing and multiple exposures (which is funny because those were the first things I did when I bought my camera a few years ago, hah) And she wanted us to write our names with light, and while staying overnight at Ireland's most haunted castle I whipped this baby out. and might i add, i was able to write my name backwards first try. I was actually pretty surprised.

But anyway, that's all for now. I'll eventually make an update about the Haunted Castle in detail later. I have 200 some photo's to go through before hand, ya know.

Have a nice day. :]

i wish i was a better blogger. maybe one day i'll actually be good at it.